ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking

And from the pilot during his welcome message: “We are pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry …Unfortunately none of them are on this flight…! If People Talked to Other Professionals the Way They Talk to Teachers, Now That Half of Middle-earth Is Immune to the One Ring’s Powers, I Don’t Think This Fellowship Is Really Necessary, Unsolicited Advice on How to Get Pregnant from Your Neighbor Jenna, Kath from Book Club, and Ancient Sumerian Fertility Deity, Ninkharsag, I, William Shakespeare, Also Went Through a Pandemic, It Was Not an Insurrection — It Was a Group of Innocent Patriots on Their Way to 2-for-1 Taco Night at Chili’s. Please remain calm. Recommended Posts. "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking" Long "Our aircraft has reached its designated altitude, you may now unfasten your seatbelts. Welcome ladies and gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. Welcome on board today's flight SK1777, from Copenhagen to ...」 「起飛啦，就起飛啦。喂，你望吓出面！」一位女士興奮 The bad news is that we have no approved landings due to the global pandemic and we are out of fuel. Ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking I welcome you onboard year 2020, the journey time 366 days! Despite the lack of time, Moody made an announcement to the passengers that has been described as "a masterpiece of understatement ": Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. Ladies and Gentlemen…this is your captain speaking Today has been a day that I spent some time thinking over every detail before tackling it head on. #drinktheeast…” In one of his most elegiac stories, Eggers gives us a beautiful testament to family, memory, and what we leave behind. You should thank me, honestly. There’s no way I can think of a light for everything I might want you to do. Happiness inbound. Easily move … #pleasedontgo #mrbentley_thedog #helicopter #aviation "Ladies & gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Exchange knowledge! Smoke 'em if you got em and may God have mercy on us all. Although, to be precise, you don’t “fly straight up” when that happens. Also, I get way bored up here. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, it appears main thruster engine has initiated test burn. One guy died. Thank you very much for choosing Mandarin Airlines. Now sit back and relax – OH, MY GOD!”, Silence followed and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen I am so sorry if I scared you earlier; but, while I was talking, the flight attendant brought me a cup of coffee and spilled the hot coffee in my lap.You should see the front of my pants!” A passenger in Economy said, That’s nothing. More on Genius "6pm" Track Info. Каждый Авиапассажир в Каждом РЕЙСЕ слышит Это приветствие Командира Корабля по старым понятиям и теперишным КАПИТАНА.)))) Maybe you will from now on! P. Control Lyrics: Nuestra presentacion especial comenzara en breve / Pero antes un mensaje de nuestros auspiciadores / Uh, yeah / Uh / Good morning ladies and gentlemen / … The story of BA flight 009 and the words every passenger dreads ... 'Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I decided that as my wife was busy all day with appointments and getting her hair done (she has a lot more hair to style than me) I was going to take our daughter on a shopping trip to the big island. The expected flight duration is four hours and ten minutes, our current speed is AAAAH, OH FUCK, NONONONONO, HOLY SHIT, OH MY GOD!! You may now remove your seatbelts and float around freely. I trust you are not in too much distress." May 22, 2020 - /r/WeatherGifs is a sub for gifs and videos of all naturally-occurring meteorological phenomena. All three are capable of piercing body armor at a distance of up to 27 feet and can put a hole in human bone and flesh the size of the Grand Canyon, which by the way is coming up on the left-hand side of the plane, so just sit back and relax and enjoy the rest of the flight, Announcements You Don’t Want to Hear on an Airplane, On an ocean crossing flight: “This is your Captain speaking, I just wanted to take this time to remind you that your seat cushions can be used as floatation devices…”, “Hey folks, we’re going to play a little game of geography trivia. Achetez neuf ou d'occasion Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. That's why you have to drink a lot of it. Does the Germanwings tragedy mean passengers now have to … Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. Achetez le design « Ladies and Gentlemen, This Is Your Captain Speaking » par Lanis Rossi sur les produits suivants : Stand by. Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron today. Not everyone was amused in this particular case. If you can recognize where we are, tell your flight attendant and receive an extra pack of peanuts.”, “Our sudden loss of altitude allows a unique close up perspective of the local terrain. Some months later the same crew were together and, you guessed it, the Captain did an even worse one. I've developed a routine before traveling which varies depending on my destination/s. Eject!”, As the plane turns around right after takeoff: “… uhhhhh … We have to go back. I owed it to you!”.“But I never keyed the mic!”, responded the Captain. Millionaire. I’m a Capricorn and your co-pilot is a Sag. Nous allons passer au dessus de Los Angeles. Those aren’t federal crimes. We should touch down in Dallas at 5:23 local time, depending on this headwind. LADIES and GENTLEMEN! So I’m sure you’re probably wandering around my blog saying “what is all this?” Well, gee, thanks for asking! Somebody stop me! For example, don’t say, “Please DO raise your tray tables TO the upright AND locked position.” Instead, say, “Please do RAISE your tray tables to the UPRIGHT and LOCKED position.” For some reason you all think emphasizing the less important words, like helping verbs and whatnot, makes you sound professional. Welcome on board with @psg @thiagosilva_33…” Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the captain speaking. 85. Welcome to Flight Number 123, non-stop from New York to Los Angeles. Storyboard This is Your Captain Speaking. A couple little facts here. To clear up the questions on everybody’s mind: All the female flight attendants have husbands, though the brunette married for money and really needs to get some. I've turned the fasten your seat belt sign back on because shit is about to get real.“ – popular memes on the site ifunny.co View top-quality stock photos of Ladies And Gentlemen This Is Your Future Captain Speaking. "Ladies & gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Become a McSweeney’s Internet Tendency patron today. No offense. There’s no cause for alarm; we can get down quite safely. The expected flight duration is four hours and ten minutes, our current speed is AAAAH, OH FUCK, NONONONONO, HOLY SHIT, OH MY … “Beautiful and brilliant. We seemed to have moved through the turbulence, but I ask that you keep your seat belts on for the remainder of the flight. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the captain speaking. ‘Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking,’ said the voice over the intercom. Thank you for choosing Archer Brewing. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. We're having a slight malfunction with the autopilot. All passengers fall silent. We have a small problem — all four engines have stopped. You’ll probably never again hear this… The captain has turned off the no smoking sign…. Really, you have no idea. I decided that as my wife was busy all day with appointments and getting her hair done (she has a lot more hair to style than me) I was going to take our daughter on a shopping trip to the big island. Today, getting from Point A to Point B, especially by airplane, is about as enjoyable as having bamboo shoots rammed down one's nails. ), “This is your Captain speaking, these damn planes are a lot different than the ships I’m used to… so please give me some leeway if this flight doesn’t go to well.”, “It would be a good idea right now if everyone would close their shades and watch the in-flight movie.”, “We’ve now reached our cruising altitude of 20,000 feet and … Damn!”“Aww, I can’t figure out how to turn this thing off and don’t worry, that gauge is always on ‘E’.”, “Stewardess would you please bring four parachutes to the front cabin.”From the stewardess after placing a drink order: “Okay, this man wants a soda and we need three martinis for the cockpit.”, “Hey, why don’t you tell that new stewardess she can come sit on my lap and fly the plane.”. After a particularly lousy landing by the co-pilot of an Australian commercial airline, that co-pilot heard the Captain announce “Ladies and Gentlemen, XXX airlines wishes to apologise for that rough landing provided today by our first officer”. Some months later the same crew were together and, you guessed it, the Captain did an even worse one. Flight attendants, two dirty martinis to the cockpit, please. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.”, The Best Airline Captain Announcement Ever. As I said, it keeps my skills sharp. Well, first of all, because of this fabulous haircut! You are about to reply to a thread that has been inactive for 183 days. “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. So, did you hear the one about the airline passenger who was so stupid, the other airline passengers noticed? Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Ladies and Gentlemen, this is the captain speaking. Ladies and Gentlemen, This is Your Captain Speaking. Most of these extra lights I designed myself. Any Born-Again Christian pilots out there? Our fleet of beers are 100% Australian made and each contain less than 5ppm of gluten. On behalf of your cockpit and cabin crews, please, sit back and enjoy your trip. And assuming I decide to go there. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have smooth and uneventful flight. And our chief flight attendant Roger has a Ruger Bearcat .22 with a hand fluted cylinder. Our destination is Minmus, with a layover on the Mun for refueling. We will fly together to new destinations, discovering new places, watching sunsets and sunrises together! volume vi: ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking... Back in our parents' and grandpare nts' days, air travel was an adventure, a distinct and exciting part of a trip itself. Why do some people do that? It just cheapens the in-flight instructions. Bomber Pilots Do Them Too. ‘I’m afraid we have engine trouble, so we’ll have to make an emergency landing. Continue reading LADIES & GENTLEMEN, THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING → Captain Vorland examines the state-of-the-art sonar detection systems newly installed on Crystal Serenity’s bridge for the Northwest Passage voyage to assess floating ice and approaching wildlife. Everything I want from a novel. Not yet! Your youngest brother had invited you, your siblings and their spouses to his Finca on the… Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, we’ll have to make an emergency landing. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. NZ Herald. I’m packing a Colt King Cobra, that’s a 357 caliber firearm with a black rubber grip and a 6-inch barrel. If you look out the right side of the aircraft you will notice flight 195 challenging us to a race. Mais ne vous inquiétez pas, ce n'est pas un volcan. "Ladies and Gentlemen This is Your Captain Speaking" Updated on January 10, 2019. I am anal; I must go in order. you’ve just gone over but i am already asking you when you’re coming back! In Wilmington, Del., Kristopher T. Starr is an Attorney at Law, Ferry Joseph, P.A. 103 Likes, 2 Comments - One Love Brewery (@onelovebrewery) on Instagram: “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. On behalf of the flight crew, let me welcome you aboard Delta Flight 1647 to Dallas-Fort Worth with continuing service to Sacramento. Folks, I kid. KLM Social Media wants YOU! THIS is YOUR CAPTAIN speaking! Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land … it’s a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern.”, As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Washington National, a lone voice comes over the loudspeaker: “Whoa, big fella. Welcome ladies and gentlemen, this is your Captain speaking. Nov 18, 2019 - Ladies and gentleman this is your captain speaking. Yarn is the best search for video clips by quote. 21 September 2011. 21 September 2011. Welcome aboard the all-new Great British Railways — only available in England because we will not be in hoc to any union.This is your Sharing aviation passion! … We… We… uhhhhhh …forgot something…”, “To the passengers on the right-hand side of the plane, I’m sure you’ve noticed the loss of an engine, however the reduction in weight and drag will mean we’ll be flying much more efficiently now.”, “Fasten your seat belts!” (Spoken in the same tone your friend with suicidal driving tendencies uses when you get in a car. WHOA!”. pondrejack Uncategorized March 30, 2019 2 Minutes. LADIES AND GENTLEMAN: THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING The anonymous postings of a retired airline captain who is in LOVE with GOD. Your support, opinion, interaction is needed this year! All four engines have stopped. Bogey at 2 O’clock … He’s hot on our tail! Also the co-pilot is carrying a Kimber custom defense pistol with all the bells and whistles you’d expect from a custom gun of that kind, with an alloy frame and bevel treatment on the entire gun. Our flight attendants will be serving drinks in five minutes. Prev; 1; 2; Next; Page 2 of 2 . Replay du lundi 8 décembre 2014 COUP FRANC : Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking Living, loving, dying—You People is an elegant work of all three.”—The Seattle Times. Wine doesn't have many vitamins Wine doesn't have many vitamins. Things You Can See Almost Every Day In Dubai, Comical Google Maps Glitches With Airplanes. Ladies & Gentlemen, This Is Your Captain Speaking Traveling enlightens the mind and soul. A true story from the Australian Aviation magazine: After a particularly lousy landing by the co-pilot of an Australian commercial airline, that co-pilot heard the Captain announce “Ladies and Gentlemen, XXX airlines wishes to apologise for that rough landing provided today by our first officer”. Coming up on the left, we’re going to be catching a glimpse of the Grand Canyon. The airplane drops, while you remain in place. *DING* “Ladies and gentleman, this is your captain speaking. Find the exact moment in a TV show, movie, or music video you want to share. I have no idea what I’m doing. 9GAG . And after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, “Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I … Displaying the stiff-upper-lip spirit that built an empire, he uttered the words that are every air passenger's worst nightmare: 'Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We have a small problem. All four engines have stopped. We are doing our damnedest to get it under control. Ding dong! On behalf of your former captain—who is currently hurtling toward the earth at terminal velocity—I’d like to welcome you aboard Panau Airlines Flight 635, with service to wherever I feel like ditching the aircraft. Mar 18, 2019 - We'll be back with a new seasonal collection soon! I've turned the fasten your seat belt sign back on because shit is about to get real." “Ladies and gentlemen from the flight deck, this is your captain speaking.” -Most cabin announcements by the captain begin with at least “Ladies and gentlemen this is your captain speaking”. Our flight attendants will be serving drinks in five minutes. Our fleet of beers are 100% Australian made and each contain less than 5ppm of gluten. We’re flying at an altitude of 37,000 feet and our airspeed is 400 miles an hour. Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking Published on February 4, 2020 February 4, 2020 • 20 Likes • 4 Comments One particularly vivid example comes to mind. So if I make up something, but don’t have a light with an icon of that action, you still have to do it. （機長廣播） 「Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Folks, we’ve just hit our cruising altitude of 11,000 feet. Now sit back and relax.. OH, MY GOD!” Silence followed. Sally: Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking.I'm sure you've heard those words or words to that effect, beam out of the cockpit when you're on a plane. Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you, Congress. Posted by. Play on Spotify. Welcome aboard Flight #2021 with service from San Francisco to the world on Saturday, January 16th for Ascend Online: Now Boarding! Noté /5. Flying an aircraft comes with immense responsibility – operating complex machinery at 30,000 feet up, with hundreds of passengers on board, varying weather conditions – preparation is key, and involves thousands of hours of practice, and … Drop image to upload or. Posted by barbiepat 22. As little as $1 a month ($12 a year!) I love traveling. However, it is almost standard for pilots to use common phrases while making cabin announcements. Though I’ve turned off the seat-belt light, please note the “no smoking” light will remain on throughout the flight, in compliance with FAA regulations. Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking! We now keep pistols in the cockpit. Who Wore It Better: A Professionally Styled Model, or Me? Tonight I'm braving a red-eye flight from LAX to BWI with a final destination of York, PA. Thank you.” About 40 minutes later, the plane began its initial descent into the West Palm Beach airport. Now sit back and relax.. OH, MY GOD!” Silence followed. In front you can watch the in-flight movie. In December of … Your thoughts? Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your captain speaking, it appears main thruster engine has initiated test burn. Contact Author “Folks, we’ve just hit our cruising altitude of 11,000 feet. Et sur la gauche de l'appareil, vous pouvez voir un cratère. Good afternoon, this is your captain speaking with just a little flight information. Retrouvez 'Ladies and Gentlemen, this is your Surgeon speaking': Exploring the Human Factor in Aviation and Surgery et des millions de livres en stock sur Amazon.fr. Ladies and Gentlemen…this is your captain speaking Today has been a day that I spent some time thinking over every detail before tackling it head on. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Then he meets his captain, Fabrizio Mobrici and things do not go as … On behalf of your cockpit and cabin crews, please, sit back and enjoy your trip. And so low-maintenance, it would make you sick! save. The captain said: “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Replay du lundi 8 décembre 2014 COUP FRANC : Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking Mad Max Inspired Plane to Monster Car Makeover. Ladies and gentlemen, this is captain is speaking. 6pm Home. Summary: Ermal has to fill in for a colleague at work, a bit scared but also excited for his first long-distance flight as first officer. Again, kidding! This amazing paragraph that you’re reading is called a post. Good evening ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking Welcome aboard DC-10 flight number 1313 We will be cruising at a height of 25,000 feet at an air speed of 600 miles per hour Headphones will be provided by request for a varied program of in flight music Have a good flight. Robert is a father, husband, chef, life coach recording artist, sculptor and would love to add "Author" to his list of dreams fulfilled. Upload a Post. Hello Ladies and Gentlemen this is your captain speaking Today I will be teaching you how to get unlimited Asian women (Twiist is crazy bro) So just turn up your … So the ceiling hits you hard in the head. October 2015. The First Officer replied “Remember a couple of months back? We have a small problem. On behalf of the flight crew, let me welcome you aboard Delta Flight 1647 to Dallas-Fort Worth with continuing service to Sacramento. All four engines have stopped. The Completely Normal, Totally Reasonable Unwritten Rules of Baseball. “Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking” “Our aircraft has reached its designated altitude, you may now unfasten your seatbelts.

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